I have been living a double life lately. While I have been working with colleagues to recruit, orient, and move in 11,000 new Spartans, I have also been parenting an 18-year-old as she makes the transition from high school to college.
For the first three days of last week, I pushed green carts full of dorm room accessories and answered questions for new students and their families about enrolling in classes and securing financial aid to pay for their educations. After more than a quarter of a century as a professor and administrator, all of this is familiar and comfortable for me.
But on Thursday, I found myself on the opposite side of the table as I dropped off my freshman to start her college experience. The questions and the excitement and the fears were now all mine, and I was no longer comfortable. It wasn’t just that I was at a different institution, it was that I was in a fundamentally different role.
I have been reflecting a lot on how dramatically different it feels on either side of starting college. I would have thought my knowledge and time on one side of the experience would have allowed me a sense of comfort on the other side. It has not. But I have learned a great deal this year as a parent of a rising college freshman:
Much of the transition from high school to college happens during a student’s senior year in high school. Viewing the experience from the college’s side, it always appeared to me that the transition began with New Student Orientation. But senior year is so critically important, and it provides a much more significant foundation for success in college than I had ever before understood.
Applying for and choosing a college is very stressful. It does not matter how well prepared or competitive a student is, it is a hard choice. It feels momentous. Students feel personally judged. After they are accepted, they have to make a decision that balances choosing the school that “feels right” with massive financial implications and completely unknown future factors. Advice to “trust your gut” seems to lead to even more indecision and frustration on the part of the student.
The admissions process has the potential to be a very influential developmental space for our students. Traditionally, it has been a “sorting space,” in which institutions select students who they believe have the skills and knowledge necessary to be academically successful. But, it can be a developmental space in which the experience of applying to and choosing to attend a school can be designed to shape students rather than merely select them. Some universities are beginning to show us how this can be done.
Grades, classes, majors, and all the “academic” issues seem much less consequential than social and mental health concerns. Students and their families worry about students feeling accepted and finding a trusted friend group. Academic success seems like a given; social success and personal satisfaction are much less so.
As we launch ourselves into another academic year, I am excited to see how we all bring our personal experiences and professional expertise into our student support. While uncomfortable at times, watching my daughter begin her college journey has offered me a unique lens into how we can reach students and address what influences their experience while here. Continuing to make Michigan State a more accessible, and even better at providing every student with a caring and supportive environment, will take us far in helping every student we admit to learn, thrive, and graduate.
